Your partner’s true nature, are you ready to accept it after marriage? The first question you should ask yourself before deciding to marry him/her. Including your views of life and your lifestyle is already compatible with him/her.
Daftar Isi (TOC):
Two or three years of first year married life will be many new things that you meet from your partner. A new reality that is fun and happy for you. You will also find annoying new facts from your partner. After marriage, your partner doesn’t hesitate to show his/her true nature in front of you.
For example, you must be ready to see your wife’s face without make-up, wake up with a sad face, disheveled hair, or your husband’s body odor. Some of these examples you will meet after marriage from your partner.
Your partner’s true nature, are you ready to accept it after marriage? Not only your partner’s appearance, but also their character and behavior
Married life is not the same as dating life. Three months or three years of marriage, maybe you are still surprised to see his/her different nature and behavior. Even though when you were dating, you never saw the nature and behavior of him/her like that.
After marriage there are things that you feel are not in accordance with your nature, but you love him/her very much. On the other hand, you feel desperate to deal with it. Especially when you are dealing with the true nature of your partner.
Not infrequently, a question arises in your mind “Why is he not like when he was dating? He changed after marriage.” This happens because of the unrealistic expectations that you have made when entering the gates of marriage.
For example, you think he will change after marriage, you believe after marriage you will be happy forever with your partner, or you want to accept the true nature of your partner who is very different from you.
What you finally realize is that accepting the difference is not something that is easy to live with. You try hard to match yourself with your partner, but instead it causes conflict, hurt, or misunderstanding in your marriage.
Read more: You Often Fight in Your Relationship Because of Different Love Languages
Your partner’s true nature, are you ready to accept it after marriage? Not necessarily he will change after marriage, even if you think your partner is “The One”
Her personality doesn’t necessarily change completely after marriage. He did not want to change his character because he thought there was nothing wrong with him/her. Not infrequently, after marriage there are conflicts that arise from trivial things because of your different perspectives.
What you can do is encourage him to make changes in his/her life, but not change his/her character that was formed since childhood or before he met you.
3 things you should know he doesn’t necessarily change after marriage
1. There is no perfect partner
There are partners who are willing to work hard to overcome differences in their relationship. You and your partner have weaknesses, inappropriate attitudes, or different habits.
2. You can’t change his/her character
Remember, the harder you try to change him/her. Of course the harder he will fight with all his/her stance. What you need to do is change your attitude first so that he will change according to your wishes.
3. Only your partner can change himself
After marriage, his/her personality does not automatically change according to your expectations. You can only help the process of changing him/her, but you are not the key to his change.
Read more: Nobita Has Doubts About Marrying Shizuka in Stand by Me Doraemon 2
Your partner’s true nature, are you ready to accept it after marriage? There are 4 ways to know his/her true nature so that you don’t choose the wrong partner
1. The way he treats the maids
This is the easiest way to see his/her true nature. Every time you go to a restaurant, make sure your focus is not just ordering food, but also paying attention to the details of his/her attitude.
How does he treat the waiter? Did he say thank you? Does he yell or say rudely when the order is wrong or long wait for the order? Did he leave a small tip on the restaurant table for the waitress for good service?
The way he treats restaurant waiters, hotel waiters, luggage carriers at airports or train stations can provide information about his/her true personality.
2. The way he treats his/her own mother
The second way is no less important, can he be respectful and polite to his/her mother? If he had treated his/her mother not full of respect and courtesy.
Yes, you can say he is a troubled person because his/her behavior will describe the way he treats you not well in the future.
3. Introducing you to his/her friends
Usually people introduce their boyfriend/girlfriends to their friends in order to have a good relationship. It’s easy, get the blessing of his/her friends. Well, you can use this method to find out his/her personality from his/her friends.
How does your boyfriend/girlfriends interact with his/her friends? How is his/her friendship, healthy or toxic? Does he spend more time with his/her friends late at night? You can take this into consideration.
4. Try asking questions in the middle of the chat
This last method concerns his/her ability to communicate and is closely related to problem solving. When you talk, but he doesn’t listen to what you say.
This means that he is no longer paying attention to what you are discussing. It’s okay for you to ask questions in the middle of a chat to see if he’s really listening or not.
If not, this can be taken into consideration. He is not suitable to be a prospective husband or wife for you. Remember, love is not enough for a lasting and happy marriage.
Read more: A Little Princess Explains the Meaning of Family Not Just Families of Origin
Conclusions of your partner’s true nature after marriage
You are married to your partner, then you must be ready to accept his/her true nature. Not only a matter of appearance, but also his/her character and behavior. After marriage, there is usually no more shyness from your partner.
After marriage, everything will be shown by him/her compared to when the two of you were still dating. Not to mention there is a habit of your partner who is still reluctant to admit mistakes and apologize first without being asked.
At the beginning of your relationship, you two have gotten used to learning to admit mistakes and apologize without being asked. After marriage the good habits will continue. In fact, your children will imitate your habits.
Thank you for reading this article. Hope it is useful. If you like this article please share to your family and friends. Follow our Instagram and Google News.
Kamu mau curhat dan menginginkan solusi profesional dari konselor atau psikolog klinis? Langsung saja ke menu layanan curhat.
